Divorce mediation may feel like just another task demanding attention as your marriage reaches its end. But mediation should be viewed as a positive step forward. With a well-trained professional giving guidance, this process can help resolve your issues in a polite and cooperative manner.
7 Benefits of Divorce Mediation
1. Gain Control
Walking into a courtroom means placing your future into the hands of a judge. They will make decisions on matters like property division and child custody. You have no idea what the outcome will be and, in the meantime, will likely be subject to great stress. Mediation, on the other hand, affords greater control. You and your spouse can work through important issues together and identify solutions that suit both of you.
An expert mediator will oversee negotiations that give rise to amicable conclusions. You will still be allowed to present your case and the supporting evidence, as well as explain your personal needs and discuss areas of agreement and disagreement. The difference is you and your spouse will reach a resolution together rather than get pushed into a settlement.
2. Enjoy Confidentiality
Unlike court proceedings that may be made public and even gain negative media attention, agreements made during mediation stay confidential. Both you and your spouse must agree if any details are to be made public. This feature appeals to many couples given the sensitive issues discussed during a divorce.
Just as important, mediation allows you to take a break and clear your head if the process doesn’t yield the desired results. You can then resume discussions on another day, after you and your spouse have had time to consider your positions. This means proceedings move on your schedule rather than that of the court.
3. Reach a Faster Resolution
Going to court can be a trying experience, especially if you work and/or have young children. Similarly, courts move in a notoriously slow and often messy manner. Enduring this process can feel like time is suspended and the divorce itself will never be finalized.
Mediation, as mentioned a moment ago, can be scheduled at a mutually agreeable time for both parties. It’s often done in a comfortable meeting space with break-out rooms for each spouse to hold private, separate discussions with the mediator(s). This process allows many issues to be negotiated in just one session.
4. Profit from Neutral Co-Mediators
Divorce mediation can be carried out with more than one mediator. To illustrate, you might choose one professional experienced in child welfare or mental health and another trained in financial matters. One may even be male and the other female to help the negotiation process feel more balanced.
Two mediators can also ensure the process continues without any possibility of bias. Likewise, negotiations can move more quickly as each mediator might hold separate discussions with you and your spouse. Keep in mind that whether you choose one or two mediators, the goal is to help you negotiate your own separation agreement.
5. Save Money
Mediation is generally more affordable than trying to settle a divorce in court. Traditional litigation can be expensive with unpredictable costs. You might expect a single hearing to be enough to finalize your divorce only to learn three hearings will in fact be necessary.
Mediation is markedly cheaper, even if you and your spouse prefer two mediators. It’s true that adding another professional will increase the overall costs, but this option still remains more affordable and convenient than pursuing legal action with the courts.
6. Push the Arguments Aside
The very nature of divorce means it can get heated. But choosing to end your marriage doesn’t have to lead to ongoing arguments. Rather than rely on shouting and bullying, a mediator will maintain the peace and look for amicable solutions. In turn, you can expect careful and respectful dialogue. You can also, finally, push aside hurt feelings of the past and look forward to moving on with your life.
7. Put Your Children First
Divorce is unquestionably difficult for spouses, but it’s even harder on children. They’re likely to be burdened by stress as they wonder where they will live, who they will live with, and what the future will bring. Some even feel the divorce is their fault, while others feel neglected as you and your spouse engage in increasing letters, phone calls, and negotiations before going to court.
In contrast, divorce mediators treat you as parents, not litigants. Every effort is made to keep your children’s lives intact. Negotiations are likewise steered in a way to preserve the family ties that once existed between you and your spouse. You are both encouraged to build a clear co-parenting plan even as your intimate life together reaches an end.
Mediation commonly leads to a satisfactory outcome more quickly than court action. It is free of the multiple delays that encumber traditional litigation and helps keep money in your pocket. Mediation also focuses on your children’s well-being and grants you more control of the separation details.iv
